Hi All,
Strange and new topic for me tonite. So, here it is. A good friend of mine (who just happens to have once been a boyfriend too) just told me recently that he is choosing to not email with me anymore. The reason is because his fiance has been hurt by our friendship and thus continuing to email with me is continuing to hurt her. Not good. Not good at all. I felt so bad about all of this and still do. Not just because someone's feelings got hurt and that always sucks but because I have been in her shoes too. Not once but a few different times. I have been the person who had their feelings hurt and each time my then boyfriend never, not once, offered to stop communicating with the said offender. Me, being me, I never wanted to say what I wanted (ie stop talking to her) and so I sat and got hurt, and felt jealous, and built resentments and insecurities one after the other.
I know deep down that I absoluely must adhere to my friends request and yet I feel...sad. I feel the loss of a friendship that I very selfishly do not want to give up. I will give it up. I will do the right thing bc that is what sober and mature people do. Also, I really want my frend to be happy and I want his relationship to be strong and healthy. I do not for one second what to be part of anything bad or complicated bc that is not how my fe works anymore. What used to be always complicated has gotten much simpler. Do the next right thing. Right action equals Right thinking. So, I will blog and move on. We all need to grow up sometime I guess. Xx
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